A:

It’s the background to your helping relationship with a caller.  It includes a number of important aspects that contribute to the caller getting help.  As a New Hope counselor you represent New Hope, the Crystal Cathedral, Dr. Schuller, “Christian counselor,” and God.  (Yes, those are some big shoes to fill!  But relax because you don’t have to be perfect, just being a caring, respectful person who is available is enough.) 

Each one of those pieces of your identity can be very powerful to the caller in generating hope and a positive expectation of being helped, which in itself assists in the caller getting help.  Also there is a specific purpose to the call which is uncommon to most conversations in life and which helps to make it helpful: you are there to listen, to care, and to try to help the caller. 

And the help you offer needs to be limited to a reasonable time frame of about thirty minutes per phone call, unless it’s a crisis call in which case you spend as much time as needed, or a frequent caller who is stuck, manipulative, or abusive in which case you try to limit the call to ten minutes or less.  (All times are longer by about 50% on the internet.) 

The obvious facts that the caller is on a phone or in a chat room and talking to someone he/she doesn’t know and probably calling from home are also part of the context that may help the caller feel comfortable sharing in depth and getting help.  Additionally, the caller took initiative to call you, is paying for the call (or internet service), and is investing some time and effort in the call.  The caller’s investment helps him or her to be motivated to get help and to take responsibility to receive the help that is offered. 

In sum, each of these aspects of the New Hope context  - your helper identity, an explicit helpful purpose, limited time, the phone or chat room setting, and the caller’s initiative and investment - are important to the caller actually being helped and must be respected by both counselor and caller.

A:

Yes and no.  It depends on how you define “anonymous.”  The calls are anonymous in that you use an alias, normally don’t know the caller’s last name, probably haven’t talked with the caller at New Hope before, and the two of you have never met face to face. 

But the calls are not anonymous in an impersonal sense because you should learn the callers’ first name, where they’re calling from, and what they need help with today and if you have talked to the caller at New Hope before you can reference that. 

In short, the key issue here is that you get to know a real person on the other end who has a real need right now that you can help with and that you limit the relationship to the New Hope context.

A:

No.  They are confidential between the caller and New Hope. 

The New Hope staff and other counselors, including trainers, may be involved in any given conversation for supervision or support, during or after the call.  Don’t let a caller entice you to keep secrets from New Hope staff.  (To prevent a suicide you can offer such promises, realizing that you may need to break your promise.) 

Also, remember there are some important emergency exceptions to calls being confidential between the caller and New Hope, including if a caller intends to commit suicide or homicide or if you believe a child or an elder may have been abused.

A:

In most cases you would not transfer the call, and should say something like, “I’m sorry _______ isn’t available right now, how can I help you?”  If the caller persists in wanting to speak with that particular counselor then offer to take a message, saying that you will forward it.  If the caller asks when the counselor will be in then don’t give out that counselor’s shift schedule. 

Instances in which you would not transfer a call include: stuck frequent callers, complaints, sex calls and other inappropriate callers.  Also, keep in mind that if the lines are busy then it’s too disruptive to make other callers wait while you try to figure out if the counselor is available and then transfer the call.  

If, on the other hand, the requested counselor is available, the phones are slow, and the caller’s need is appropriate and significant then it may be okay to transfer the call.  An example of a call you might transfer would include a caller in crisis who wants to follow up with the same counselor who happens to be available just then.

A:

Some frequent callers will develop a preference for certain counselors, figure out their shift time, and call and hang up until they get the counselor they want.  Often this is a problem because it indicates that the caller is overly dependent upon one New Hope counselor.  If the caller is a frequent caller who is stuck, manipulative, or abusive and you follow the procedures of limiting the call time and lovingly challenging the caller then you’ll be discouraging this type of dependency. 

If you have a needy frequent caller in crisis who is benefiting from New Hope and calling you week after week then you need to be especially careful not to facilitate the caller relying solely on you.  Don’t get hooked into the idea that you’re the best counselor or the only one who can help this caller.  (Certain callers will tell you this to try to manipulate you into listening to them longer and being extra nice.) 

Encourage the caller to seek support from other people besides you (after you’ve given any needed support!), perhaps including other New Hope counselors.  Be sure to give referrals in these cases and, if you talk to the caller again, check to see if the referral was followed up on.

A:

It can be difficult to let go of an emotional call and not worry about a caller long after the call has ended.  Remember, your job is to offer the help that you can in the time that you have.  It’s the caller’s job to receive that help and get more help elsewhere if necessary. 

Therefore, if you need to go, but the caller still needs more help then you need to do the best you can to wrap up the call and encourage the caller to call back to New Hope later or to follow up on a community referral.  You don’t need to be the hero; it’s not your responsibility to make the caller well.  So don’t overdo and stay too late if it’ll overburden you or you don’t have the time.  (Unless you have a suicidal caller on the line in which case we ask you stay with the call until the caller is helped.) 

Be especially careful with emotional calls that may tempt you to step out of the New Hope context.  Never give out your name, personal phone numbers, email address, or other addresses.  And don’t offer to meet with callers face to face to offer assistance of some kind.  If you believe you have a special situation that calls for an extraordinary response then clear that with the New Hope staff.   And, please know that the New Hope staff is available and eager to support you whenever you want to talk about a call you took.

A:

This is a very rare occurrence, but if it happens do what you can to minimize what can be a confusing interaction for the caller. Don't identify yourself as a New Hope counselor and don't discuss anything the caller shared with you or reveal your knowledge of the caller.  Hopefully, the fact that you used a phone name will help to protect your identity in such situations.

A:

No, unless you have permission from the New Hope staff.   Remember that an important part of the New Hope context is that the caller takes initiative to call us. 

If you feel that you have a situation that calls for you to write, call, or email a caller from New Hope then get this cleared with the New Hope staff.  (This does not refer to appropriate email reply messages through New Hope Online which are a standard part of our ministry.)

A:

Yes, but only in a very limited sense.  The purpose of any self-disclosure should be to help callers with their needs or problems.  Don't use callers to listen to you work through your problems.

From time to time you may share a personal anecdote, story, or lesson you learned in order to relate with or encourage the caller, but be sure to keep it brief and to focus on a positive example of something you've overcome or learned from.  Don’t take too long to do this and don’t share something that is still rather unresolved for you.  After you’ve shared make sure to bring the focus back to the caller’s need.

A:

While you’re on the New Hope phones or chat room helping callers we want you to take care of yourself too.  You matter just as much as the callers do.  Because you matter we want you to take care of your own needs even as you’re trying to care for callers’ needs.  Taking care of yourself will help you be a more effective caregiver and help you feel better about your New Hope experience.  

Therefore, if you need to take a break for a couple of minutes on your shift then please do so.  Go ahead and turn your phone off for a moment if you need to go to the bathroom, to catch your breath, to fill out a contact sheet, or to debrief with a staff person or fellow counselor. 

Of course, we ask to minimize such breaks since we want the callers on hold to get help and we don’t want you to leave your fellow shift mates carrying the load without you.