Dr. Bill Gaultiere
(714) 971-4213

Sexually Inappropriate Callers:

·        “I am uncomfortable listening to you go into explicit detail about your sex life.  I am happy to help you if you will be more modest in describing your relationship problems.”

·        “It’s not appropriate for you to ask me about my sex life.  Do you have a problem I can help you with?” 

·        “It seems you’re being sexual with me (masturbating).  That’s violating and I will not tolerate it.  Goodbye.”  

 ·     If caller does not become appropriate (discussing personal or relationship problems in a modest manner) even after confronting him or her then offer a pleasant goodbye and hang up.

Abusive / Hostile Callers

·        “You sound enraged.  I am happy to try and help you if you will control your anger and speak more calmly with me.  How can I help you today?”

·        “I’ve made a note of your complaint.  Is there anything else I can help you with?”

·        “I am offended by your harsh words.  If you don’t talk more respectfully I will hang up.”

Angry Blamer:

·        “You sound angry.  People just aren’t treating you like you want them to.  Since they won’t change what can you do differently?”

·        “It seems that you’re blaming other people for your problems.  You need to do what you can yourself to make changes.  If you don’t do something differently things won’t change for you.”

Rambler:

·        (After listening for at least a few minutes gently interrupt)  “You seem frustrated about __________ .  How can I help you with that?”

·        “You have a lot that you want to say.  You seem overwhelmed (or pressured, or anxious) about all these things.  What is it you most need help with today?”

Doesn’t Want to Say Goodbye:

·        “You seem quite concerned about _________.  I want to understand your feelings.  I only have a few more minutes I can give you.  What do you need before we hang up?”

·        “I’m sorry to interrupt you.  We need to start winding down this conversation because I have another caller on hold.  What more do you need from me in the five minutes we have left?”

·        “You sound angry at me for saying I need to go now.  I told you earlier that we were going to need to end our conversation soon and now it’s time.”

·        “We need to end our conversation now.  Would you like me to pray for you before we say good bye?”  (or offer a referral, or make a concluding empathic summary and offer an encouraging word.)

Co-dependent on Rescuing Another:

·        “You sound very concerned for ___________.  It sounds like she / he needs to call New Hope.  How is it that I can help you now?”

·        “It sounds like you’re needing help to let go.   ________ really needs help.  You’ve tried many things to be helpful but she / he just isn’t using your help.  Maybe you can’t do anything more.  It seems that she / he needs to make some changes.”

C.U.I. (Calling Under the Influence of Alcohol):

·        “Have you been drinking?  When was the last time you went to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting?” 

·        “You seem disoriented (or confused).  I cannot help you until your mind is cleared up.  Maybe you’d like to call back another time?”

Actively Psychotic:

·        “Are you under the care of a Psychiatrist?  Have you taken the medication prescribed by your doctor?”

·        “You seem confused.  I’m having trouble making sense out of what you’re saying to me.  It sounds like you need to talk to your doctor (or take your medicine as prescribed by your doctor).  Maybe you’d like to call back another time when you’re not so confused?”

See also, “Sample Responses to Frequent Callers.”